?

Log in

ravens_toy's Journal [entries|friends|calendar]
ravens_toy

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

You're beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [16 Mar 2006|07:50am]
[ mood | content ]

My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got a plan.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.

Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
Fucking high,
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.

1 comment|post comment

Comekah!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [13 Mar 2006|12:41pm]
[ mood | excited ]

Hey girly you need to go to Beaumont on the 19th and hang with us. Sidd will be wrestling there and Jack Drastic, Brett Barnes, Spudz, Gemini, Hotstuff and Hugh Rogue. It will be a kick ass show. Give a call or go to www.fulleffectwrestling.com to see the card and where it is. Hope to see you there.

9 comments|post comment

[28 Feb 2006|12:27pm]
[ mood | indescribable ]

Well, this weekend was by far more than I expected. Friday we showed up to watch Sidd and others. Saw Gator and that was fun. Haven't seen him in forever. Screamed my head off and laughed my ass off at things that in all reality are mean but I still laughed. I got asked to go fuck in the car by the T.O.D. but refused. Man that does suck that he is moving away. I will miss him. Don't tell anyone though. Watched my girl (who by the way is the toughest bitch out there) take a chop from Sidd just so we can watch him die when Hotstuff Hernandez gets his hands on him. Sidd you know I love you but it will be so much fun to watch you cry like a girl when he hits that chop. Well, the call was placed and we agreed on the location to eat. Food was eaten and some more laughing happened and the we are not worthy comments. Why you ask....because the things that were said were so wrong on so many levels but so funny that it had to be said and they were. After that we ended up at the place that makes me happy every Friday night. Well we watched some videos and went to bed. After not having much sleep we awoke to drive to the great place of San Antonio. The ride was better this time and didn't take as long. That is when the day started getting bad. The hotel room was jacked up and then we had to get a new hotel and then there was my dad. Yep that's right my daddy was there and well the person with us couldn't be seen with us by my dad. So we did the drop and follow in 5 minutes later. The show was good but all I could think about was going to him. Making sure he was ok and touching him and knowing that in the uncomfortable situation that I was in that he was the normalcy I craved, I needed and the more and more I watched him, couldn't resit. The show ended and we left with out any one noticing who we left with. We ate, drank and were merry and back to the room. Bedtime. The next morning when I woke up at the awful hour of 7a.m. I looked over at him sleeping in the bed and realized that being close to him made me more happy than I have been in a long time. It's not the sex. I swear that because the sex could be so much better. It's that fact that when I'm around him I can't help but touch him in some small way. The fact that when he smiles it is so sweet. It's fact that when he does touch me I have to tell myself to breathe. The scars and the fact that maybe he's not the best looking man in the room but my eyes drift to him and I catch myself staring at him. I have fallen harder then I thought I would. This fact made me want to run away and hide. I'm still not sure if I want to do that or not. My girl tells me I can't until after March. It doesn't matter cause the second he calls I will go running for I am owned.

2 comments|post comment

[25 Jan 2006|11:53am]
[ mood | giggly ]

"Swing Swing"

Days swiftly come and go.
I'm dreaming of her
She's seeing other guys
Emotions they stir
The sun is gone.
The nights are long
And I am left while the tears fall.

Did you think that I would cry,
on the phone?
Do you know what it feels like,
being alone?
I'll find someone new

Swing, Swing, Swing from the tangles of
My heart is crushed by a former love
Can you help me find a way
To carry on again.

Wish cast into the sky
I'm moving on
Sweet beginnings do arise
She knows I was wrong
The notes are old,
They bend, they fold
and so do I to a new love.

Bury me
(you thought your problems were gone)
Carry me
(away. away, away...)

post comment

My Dirty Lillte Secret and Oh How Dirty Do I Feel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [25 Jan 2006|11:40am]
[ mood | bouncy ]

THE ALL-AMERICAN REJECTS LYRICS

"Dirty Little Secret"

Let me know that I've done wrong
When I've known this all along
I go around a time or two
Just to waste my time with you

Tell me all that you've thrown away
Find out games you don't wanna play
You are the only one that needs to know

I'll keep you my dirty little secret
(Dirty little secret)
Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret
(Just another regret, hope that you can keep it)
My dirty little secret

Who has to know
When we live such fragile lives
It's the best way we survive
I go around a time or two
Just to waste my time with you

Tell me all that you've thrown away
Find out games you don't wanna play
You are the only one that needs to know

I'll keep you my dirty little secret
(Dirty little secret)
Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret
(Just another regret, hope that you can keep it)
My dirty little secret

Who has to know
The way she feels inside (inside)
Those thoughts I can't deny (deny)
These sleeping dogs won't lie (won't lie)
And all I've tried to hide
It’s eating me apart
Trace this line back

I'll keep you my dirty little secret
(Dirty little secret)
Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret
(Just another regret)

I'll keep you my dirty little secret
(Dirty little secret)
Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret
(Just another regret, hope that you can keep it)
My dirty little secret
Dirty little secret
Dirty little secret

Who has to know
Who has to know

post comment

Its All Good [21 Jan 2006|05:32pm]
[ mood | optimistic ]

So the more and more I try to think the more I doubt things. I am sooooooooooooo in lurve right now and I don't know how to not let it show. Yes I did say lurve. It's beyond lust but not quite love. I'm stuck in the middle. Everytime he calls or I see him I become stupid. I can't think because I have to keep telling myself to breathe. Everytime he touches me it is wonderful. I want him to touch me and the desire to touch him has yet to fade. I undress him just so I can have as much skin to skin contact as I can. Oh god, what am I to do. How do I keep myself from going over the edge. I keep telling myself it's nothing but a thing but I want all of him. I don't want anyone else to touch him. Only me. It's all mine. No one else wanted it so I picked it up and now it's MINE. Mine, mine, mine, mine. Ok I know that was just a little childish but I don't care. He's mine and at some point I'll tell him. Ok so enough about that.

I will now explain why it is all good. See last night he curled up on the couch with his head in my lap and my hand in his and fell asleep. I know, I know. He fell asleep. Yup and so did I. Prolly due to lack of oxygen from not breathing all night but I fell asleep. I know things didn't go as well as I had planned but it did get better. I think he might break me. I never thought that about anyone else but I think he might actually break me. Well, see. But It's All Good because not only did I have last night but I had Wed., last Fri. and I will get him this coming Wed. I also have him calling me and showing up at my work. God, he gets me. Here's hoping for it to stay All Good.

post comment

[14 Jan 2006|07:21pm]
<td align="center">You have a sexual IQ of 146



When it comes to sex, you are a super genius. You have had a lot of experience, and sex interests you so you know a lot about it. You pride yourself on being a source of information and guidance to all of your friends.

Take this quiz at QuizUniverse.com</td>
1 comment|post comment

Could life be better [14 Jan 2006|03:19pm]
[ mood | giddy ]

So is it bad to say "Yeah, I'm part of the Cool Kids Club." I know, I know, I sound like a sixteen year old school girl but that's how I feel right now. In that moment that you realize that you can have what you have wanted for sooooooooooooo long and now you get it makes me jump up and down like a little school girl. See ever since I have seen him I have wanted him in the worst way. I wanted to touch him, taste him and to feel every long inch of him. In one swift movement I got that. As I sat next to him and even standing across from him I fought the urge to touch him, to be near him in some small way, to feel his body heat, to know him in every way, to taste him, to breathe him in and to know what it was like to have my long awaited desire filled but I couldn't because I had to wait. I had to wait until we were alone. As the drive to get to him became the longest drive I have ever had to take I had to keep myself from exploding. I wanted to touch him and the drive was getting longer and longer. Then we got there. For a moment I wasn't sure what to do. Do I touch him or do I sit and say nothing. Do I wait from him to touch me or do I rush him to the floor and take what I wanted. As I stood up he turned and started to walk down the hall. So what did I do? You really had to ask. I followed him of course. He kissed me and I finally got to taste his lips. His hands slid across my body and that was it, I was ready to go. I touched him and if I could have I would have crawled inside him so that I could know what he felt like on the inside as well as the outside. And in that moment I was scared. Scared that I would fail, scared that he would fail, scared that this wasn't real and scared because there I was, naked in his bed, and I could barely breath through all of the trembling. But the weird thing is the best part of the night was when I sat there on the couch with his head in my lap. I couldn't help but to touch him. He is so beautiful in so many ways that he just can't see.

post comment

[12 Jan 2006|02:45pm]
Genghis Khunt
Random Brutal Sex Master (RBSMf)

We almost called you Brutus the Uterus and attached this picture:



But we figured you wouldn't understand, and rightly so. We don't understand either. So you are Genghis Khunt: master of man, bringer of pain--riding your way to conquest after conquest.

Your sexual avarice is legendary. You've already had an unusually high amount of experience, and, still you look for more. You intimidate many. You make no apologies.

Your exact opposite:
The Sonnet

Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer
Personality-wise, you're carefree and relatively easy-going. You don't plan things out ahead of time; you tend to live in the moment. Of course, this can cause some damage when the moment happens to include a screaming orgasm with her younger brother. Hence the 'brutal' tag we've given you.

But you know what, take five seconds to lock the doors, and you'll be fine. There's nothing wrong with a little sex, or a whole lot.


AVOID: The Sonnet
CONSIDER: The Stiletto, Genghis Khunt, The Playstation


Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.
My profile name: ravenstoy
post comment

Yeah I'm a slut [31 Dec 2005|09:45pm]
[ mood | horny ]

Lukewarm
Whoa! You scored 26 Sluttiness Points and -2 Ethics Points! Interesting...
Like spit in a cup, you're lukewarm. You're unethical enough to be a player but too prudish to make even that happen. Suddenly the song, "Pretty Fly For a White Guy" has popped into my head.




My test tracked 2 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:


free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 61% on Sluttiness

free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 6% on Ethics
Link: The Ethical Slut Test written by PlayfulKissing on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test
post comment

[03 Nov 2005|08:50am]
You scored as Faerie. Faerie: Aren't you a cute little flying person? Faeries are earth spirits. They live among each element completely hidden. They have cousins called Pixies. Pixies however, are very mischevious. They enjoy tormenting other creatures for fun. Little pranksters.. I hope you never meet one. Pixies have a bad reputation for finding a creature and clinging to them until death. Faeries can be somewhat close to a Pixie, but mostly they are loving, playful, and carry with them a child-like enthusiasm for life. Hide among the pedals of a Daisy, you are a Faerie.

</td>

Dragon

67%

Angel

67%

Faerie

67%

Demon

59%

WereWolf

58%

Mermaid

58%

What Mythological Creature are you? (Cool Pics!)
created with QuizFarm.com
post comment

[03 Nov 2005|08:39am]

You fit in with:
Agnosticism



Your ideals mostly resemble those of an Agnostic. You are fairly ambivalent towards any religion or spiritual connection. You lead a very busy life and find that religion and spirituality are unnecessary to your life.


0% scientific.
20% reason-oriented.





Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com
post comment

[21 Feb 2005|01:37am]
[ mood | optimistic ]

Well my life just keeps getting better and better. Not really. I've been sick and now my car is in the shop. The one good thing that came out of my car breaking down is i met a guy that has been around my circle of friends but we have never met. So I spent 3 hours talking to him and he helped me with my car. I think this was the best time I've had in almost 4 months. The tears for Scott have stopped. Now the anger is there. Everything he does, says, thinks or doesn't do pisses me off. I try not to show it but it does. Sometimes I hate the way I feel and sometimes I don't. All I know is that the 3 hours that I spent with Noah was great. It was so nice to talk to someone who had almost the story as me. I actually feel o.k. today, I just hope my car falls under the warranty so it don't cost me anything. Well, I guess I'll get back to work. Wish me luck that all works out.

post comment

[20 Oct 2003|09:02pm]
[ mood | naughty ]

well i am sitting here at work feeling all kinds of stupid and chipper. my co-worker keeps me laughing for 40 hrs a week which is nice. finally saw bizzaro's web page. i loved the 30 seconds of fame stuff. well four weeks and counting until this baby is due. it would all be better if scott would actually stay consistent it what he does. i guess that's just how it's going to be from now until this baby is 18. well i am going to back to laughing my ass off and eating for the fifth time today. until then be bad and be good at it.

post comment

[14 Apr 2003|12:24am]
[ mood | blank ]

as i listened to the radio i heard a song that made me think. it reminded me of all of those people that are gone. not that i have forgotten them i just dont see their face or hear their voice everyday. i miss them all so much. my best friend said tonight that we dont cry for those that we lost we cry for ourselves. this is so right. with every tear that stains my face my pain is remembered. then when no more tears can fall the pain fades for the moment. it never gets easier it just doesnt sting so bad now. the shock has worn off and the sting remains. i'll never understand why so many die so young. but i do know one thing where ever they are those around them are truely happy because they always made me happy. i love you guys and miss you greatly. one day i shall hug you and laugh with you again and then the sting will be gone.

post comment

[07 Apr 2003|11:31pm]
[ mood | drained ]

this is for all those people in my life that i've loved, lost, walked away from, and will see again. enjoy and know i think of all of you everyday.

I've dealt with my ghosts and I've faced all my demons
Finally content with a past I regret
I've found you find strength in your moments of weakness
For once I'm at peace with myself
I've been burdened with blame, trapped in the past for too long
I'm movin' on

I've lived in this place and i know all the faces
Each one is different but they're always the same
They mean me no harm but it's time that i face it
They'll never allow me to change
But i never dreamed home would end up where i don't belong
I'm movin' on

I'm movin' on
At last I can see life has been patiently waiting for me
And I know there's no guarantees, but I'm not alone
There comes a time in everyone's life
When all you can see are the years passing by
And I have made up my mind that those days are gone

I sold what I could and packed what i couldn't
Stopped to fill up on my way out of town
I've loved like I should but lived like I shouldn't
I had to lose everything to find out
Maybe forgiveness will find me somewhere down this road
I'm movin' on

I'm movin' on
I'm movin' on

post comment

[25 Feb 2003|03:18am]
[ mood | depressed ]

well last night was more than i expected. got to do something i thought id never do. but now im not sure if i should have done it. he didnt want me the way i want him. he wanted my body. i want more from him. i want to see him again and i want to taste him again and i want to feel him again. but i wont. he got what he wanted i guess hes through. why must i make such stupid moves. why did i kiss him. why did i even let it go that far? why didnt i just walk away? i guess ill never know.

post comment

[07 Feb 2003|11:54pm]
I have a smile stretched from ear to ear
To see you walking down the road
We meet at the lights
I stare for a while
The world around disappears
Just you and me on this island of hope
A breathe between is could be miles
Let me surround you my sea to your shore
Let me the calm you seek

Oh and every time I'm close to you
There's too much I can't say
And you just walk away
And I forgot to tell you
I love you

And the night's too long and cold here without you
I grieve in my condition for I cannot find the strength to say I need you so
Oh and every time I'm close to you
There's too much I can't say
And you just walk away
And I forgot to tell you
I love you
And the night's too long and cold here without you

you know who you are and when i see you again i will cry but they will be tears of joy and i will then tell you i love you a million times a day until the day that i die. be safe and hurry home.
post comment

[30 Apr 2002|04:40pm]
[ mood | happy ]

well today I'm feeling pretty good. I'm a little moody but that's nothing strange. work is boring but it's easy money. I could make more but I won't push it for right now. I would like to make 30k a year. I could be very happy on 30k. I'm not to greedy or I'd want more. I'm happy today. This is a first in a while seeing as for the past couple of weeks I haven't been really happy. Today is a good day. I'm going over to Jake's after work. Hopefully all goes well. I know things are weird between us but I want us to be cool with each other. I called Jake early this morning and Padro his roommate wouldn't let him talk to me. It was funny. He said he was tired of everyone calling for Jake and not him. Well that was fun. Took my mom out to lunch. It is her birthday today. I hope she enjoyed her birthday and her gifts. Well that's all for now.

post comment

looky looky [28 Apr 2002|10:23am]
The memories fading away,
upon the pillow my head lay,
resting for awhile,
take away all my denial.
Dreams of sorrow, dreams of fate,
take away this lying hate.


If it's sunny, I'll smile. And if it rains, I'll morn a while. And if it's fair, then I'll feel fair. When there's a storm, I will be there. Come rain or shine I'll flow with the weather. If we'll leave it be, it might shine forever.


You raise the blade, you make the change, you rearrange me 'till I'm sane. You lock the door, and throw away the key. There's someone in my head, but it's not me.


The music box is broken or is it
It starts to play and a haunting tune fills the air
I awake suddenly from my dream
There is no music box but yet there it is
A tiny one nestled in my hand
And I awake from my dream again as if I were peeling an onion
Its a dream and no matter how far I go I can never reach reality
post comment

navigation
[ viewing | most recent entries ]